A Dollar For Your Troubles

Charis: i've ruined my life, i'll never get out of texas.

Kathleen: i could neeevveerr be bulimic, i don't know how they do it.

Lizzee: just out of curiosity, what did you puke into?
Kathleen: the sidewalk.

Lindsey: that dog is so long.
Mirannda: it looks like a mal-nourished lion.
Charis: HAHA IT DOES.

Lizzee: it's tool central in here.
Charis: why does this city attract so many douche bags?

Mirannda: this, ladies, is the making of funny stripe.

Charis: wow. that was bad ass!

Lizzee: wait what the fuck where is it?
Mirannda: shit does lindsey have it?
Lizzee: i already checked my purse and the car.
Mirannda: oh hell no.
Lizzee: WAIT! it's in my skirt pocket! hahahaha
Mirannda: hahahahah i'm so glad we found it.
A Minute and A Half Later:
Lizzee: where did it go?
Mirannda: i thought you had it!

Kathleen Back Of The Bus Deems
Kathleen Book End Of Fun Deems

THIS FUNNY STRIPE POST IS DEDICATED TO OUR HOME GIRL KATHLLLEEENNN BECAUSE THAT GIRL IS A TROOPER AND SHE HAD A SHITTY NIGHT BUT SHE WAS NICE ABOUT IT AND SHE FOUGHT ALL THE WAY THROUGH.
we love you kathleen and we'll be there to hold your hair back because we know you would do the same for us.

Lindsey, The Black Stallion

the dark horse

Dawn and Dusk

Lindsey: i put a little bit in my mouth, then i feel the stuff seeping off of it, and then i eat it!

Lindsey: i want chips but i don't want to walk.
Mirannda: DUDE! roll over there!
Lindsey: no! god what do you think i am? high?

Spencer: dude, people are related to me.

Lizzee: i don't even remember the process of coming up here.

Adriel: there is no soap in the bathroom!

Nina: shut up and suck a dick.
silence
Adriel: oh shit nina.

Nina: i don't know how to get down this ladder.
Mirannda: foot and then hand, foot and then hand, foot and then hand.

Nina: daniel's got really powerful feet.

Nina: don't make ffff-fffun of me.

Lizzee: lets play a card game, lets play strip poker!
Mirannda: yes! yes let's play strip poker that would be really fun!
30 minutes later
Mirannda: wait did i seriously just get you guys to play strip poker?

Lizzee: why is daniel the funniest person ever?
Spencer: why is lizzee shitfaced?

Lindsey: hey charis can you make some room for me on the bean bag chair?

Lizzee: he looks like an eric.
Charis: erik, with a k.
Lizzee: okay he's erik now.

Lindsey: i'm the black stallion, you just said so yourself.
Charis: dark horse!

Lindsey Black Stallion Schiffman

FFFFrrreeeeeaaazzzzziiinnnggggg

Charis: ccan we bbblaaast the hhheeeeaaaattteerrrrr?

Lizzee: it's 61 degrees plus wind chill.
Charis: i don't think i've ever been this cold in my life

Lizzee: we're looking for wabash
Security: are you girls from glendale?
Everyone: yeahhh, we're lost
Security: yeah you're way off, there's no wabash anywhere around here
Lizzee: oh sorry
Security: it's okay just take a minute and then go because they don't want anyone who doesn't live here to be around here
Lizzee: okay, yeah we'll figure it out
rolled up windows.
Mirannda: whhaaaattt the fuuuccckkk?
Linsdey: how annoying we can't come here at night
Mirannda: that guy didn't know shit, there's a wabash around here. I LIVE ON IT.
Charis: do we look like we come from glendale?

Mirannda: what the fuck!? who hires neighborhood security?
Lindsey: what the hell was he doing there?

Lindsey's monster burps

Blast to the Past

Angus, Thongs, and Perfect Snogging

RESULTS!

Nina: is there a way to extract more sap from trees?
Lizzee: well yeah probably.
Lizzee: you just, stimulate it.

Charis: i think i hear something, quick nina jump in the pool!

Lizzee: charis! it smells like air wick in here!

(in a british accent)
Mirannda: you guys, daniel smells sooo good
Mirannda: and he's soooo passionate about vegetables and music
Mirannda: oh goodness my sex god boyfriend, he's soooo yummy
Charis: and his bum, so lush!

Nina: HAHA lizzee just dried me off, and dried off my face.

Charis: you've hit a sweet spot. you've hit the sweet spot. that's the sweet spot.

Mirannda: hakuna matata, hakuna matata
Lizzee: hakuna matata, hakuna matata, hakuna matata
Charis: what a wonderful phrase
Lizzee: it means no worries for the rest of your days
Mirannda: it's our problem free, philosophy

Lizzee: ALE YOU FOOL!

Mirannda: nina, i want to lick your face, and i want to be a giant cat before i do

Mirannda: how long has nina been in the bathroom?
Charis: i'll go over there
Mirannda: i bet she fell into the toilet
Lizzee: i wouldn't be surprised

Nina: sad middle part
Nina: pensive middle part
Nina: angry middle part
Nina: happy middle part

Charis: straight face contest, GO!
Charis: testicular cancer
Mirannda: that's terrible
Charis: sweaty balls, your parents
Mirannda: really?
Charis: daniel's sweaty balls in your mouth
Mirannda: daniel's sweaty balls in your mouth
Charis: mmfnbhs ah ah mgggg
Mirannda won.

Nina: how are you guys staying so still?
Mirannda: nina, we're all shaking, violently
Nina: but i'm trying so hard to control myself.
*nina is twitching her neck and her arms*

Man in Alley 1 (to nina): i think i'm already in love.
Man in Alley 2 (to mirannda): i'm gonna hunt me some leopard, stay still honey, stand still.

Nina: once again, i'm the ONLY one who went swimming.

Lindsey Schiffman= Sloggy Lindsey!

Coming Soon: Funny Stripe PICTURES!
and possibly videos!